Key events
3. đźđ± Israel: Noam Bettan – Michelle
Time for Israelâs Noam Bettan to perform, and as in recent years, his appearance comes with some controversy around Israelâs participation in Eurovision. This year thatâs led to Spain, Ireland, Iceland, Slovenia and the Netherlands sitting things out, which is clearly not a conversation thatâs going away any time soon.
28-year-old Noam is French-Israeli and sings in Hebrew, French and English, and to my ear the string arrangement makes it feel closer to something France might send than Israelâs usual style. We havenât seen backing dancers for Israel since Noa Kirel in 2023, but Noam has five, all in boots so DRINK. Also mirrors, so double bingo.
2. đ©đȘ Germany: Sarah Engels â Fire
Next up itâs time for Germany, which this year has confidently picked up the Fuego baton and delivered a catchy girl bop complete with extensive hairography, bass-heavy dance break and mandatory âfireâ/âliarâ rhyming arrangement.
In a bold, subversive move, Sarah Engels has resisted adding âdesireâ to the Eurovision lyric bingo, but does gift us: âLike a vampire, you hide and come out at night.â Which feels like a missed opportunity, because plenty of things hide and come out at night. Owls. Hamsters. âLike a badgerâ was right there. Call me next year, Germany.
This is fun and bouncy and very Eurovision, and also flames, boots galore and a dress reveal, so drink freely. I enjoyed that, and if you didnât, youâre a liar, liar.
1. đ©đ° Denmark: SĂžren Torpegaard Lund – FĂžr Vi GĂ„r Hjem
Am I allowed to have favourites this year? *checks contract* Yes, apparently I am, and weâre opening with one of them.
FĂžr Vi GĂ„r Hjem means âbefore I go home,â and itâs a pulsing three minutes of Danish dance, complete with a very polished routine – SĂžrenâs musical theatre background is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, in the best possible way. Itâs giving Yungblud in Olly Alexanderâs sweaty box circa 2024, and itâs easily one of the more contemporary tracks in this yearâs contest. Going first isnât ideal, but someone has to, and this is a very solid way to start the show.
Also our first clothing reveal, and itâs a quite sexy fishnet top. DRINK.
Soren Torpegaard Lund, representing Denmark Photograph: Ian West/PA
Time to meet our hosts!
Tonightâs presenters are terrible called Victoria Swarovski and Michael Ostrowski. Victoria Swarovski is a TV presenter, entrepreneur, model, designer and singer, and also a member of the actual Swarovski family, so expect an evening of increasingly sparkly wardrobe changes.
Ostrowski is a film and TV actor and popular presenter, who has spent the entire week in variations on the same 1970s blue polyester outfit, for reasons known only to him.
As per Eurovision tradition, they will somehow manage to be both wooden and cheesy at the same time. Normally Iâd say we wouldnât have it any other way, but after this weekâs semi-finals I found myself yearning for Hazel Brugger and Sandra Studer. Or Petra Mede. Or, frankly, the slow release of death.
In case you hadnât noticed, this yearâs contest is in Vienna, or Wien if youâre a local. Itâs a city of music and culture, and for one week only, also Eurovision. Last time Vienna hosted was in 2015, after Conchita Wurstâs legendary win. That was the 60th anniversary, and weâre now back in Vienna for the 70th. If youâre wondering why that maths isnât mathing, itâs because the 2020 contest never happened. Youâre welcome.
2015 was also the last time I didnât spend Eurovision week in the host city. But Iâm not experiencing FOMO at all and am ABSOLUTELY FINE.
The opening flag parade was in full swing, but has inexplicably been paused halfway so JJ can sing Wasted Love. This version is a dance remix, which Iâm enjoying very much.
Oh, the flag parade is back on. Do keep up, everyone.
We open with a VT featuring the paper boat from JJâs winning performance last year. Itâs on some kind of interminable journey from Basel to Vienna, which is technically only about 500 miles so I donât know what all the fuss is about.
It arrives at the Wiener Stadthalle to find JJ performing with the ORF Symphony Orchestra in front of 10,000 excited fans, including our very own Martin Belam! Have the best night, Martin.
Are we all ready? Cue Te Deum, and letâs get this show on the road!
Ready for some bingo?
It wouldnât be Eurovision without a vaguely irresponsible bingo-based drinking game, so take a sip (or a fistful of Pringles, should you prefer) for any occurrence of the following:
-
Mirrors
-
Clothing reveals
-
Fire
-
Knee boots
-
A dance break that arrives before the first chorus
-
Someone lying dramatically on the floor
-
Interpretive dance by men in mesh
-
Artists who style their names entirely in capital letters, for no apparent reason
Please drink responsibly, pace yourselves, and remember: Eurovision is a marathon, not a sprint. Unlike Finlandâs staging, which is very much a sprint.
How are we all celebrating this evening? As per time-honoured tradition, itâs just me in my pyjamas with a plateful of finger food and a sleeping labrador. I donât drink much these days, but I might have a glass of GrĂŒner Veltliner once the scoring begins. Please share in the comments, so I can live vicariously through your snack selection.
A message from roving reporter Martin Belam!
Iâve been in Vienna since Thursday and it has been Eurovision all the way. I went to a watch party on Thursday night for the second semi-final, where Antigoniâs Jalla for Cyprus really got the crowd excited. A few Brits tried to get a sing-a-long going for the chorus of Look Mum No Computer but the lack of enthusiasm in the room suggests Sam Battle might have a hard time with the public vote.
On Friday I went on a behind-the-scenes tour at the venue, and really if youâve never been to Eurovision before the scale of it is just incredible. I saw all the props lined up ready for the changeovers â they only have 42 seconds between acts to reset the stage â and got to sit down on in the couches in the green room.
As for the rest of tonightâs line-up, I am a big fan of Lithuaniaâs Klaus Nomi-esque look from Lion Ceccah, and Croatiaâ tattooed ladies Lelek have something hauntingly medieval about them. Greeceâs fun if irritating entry, Ferto, has a lovely little breakdown where it goes all 8-bit like it has been recorded on an old Nintendo GameBoy while Satoshiâs Viva, Moldova! is an energetic bop that will liven up the show without coming anywhere near winning.
It’s Eurovision 2026!
Evening all, and welcome to this yearâs Eurovision song contest grand final liveblog! After five years working backstage at actual Eurovision, I am BACK on my liveblog sofa to guide you through tonightâs Viennese whirlwind of glitter, drama and pyrotechnics.
And as an added bonus, your usual host Martin Belam is inside the Wiener Stadthalle watching tonightâs show live, bringing us invaluable sparkly-boots-on-the-ground insight into whatâs actually going big in the arena, as opposed to what Eurofans are angrily typing in all caps online.
Are you ready? Kick-off is at 9pm, so grab snacks, drinks and any emotional support sequins you may need, and strap in for a long but hopefully joyful night of Eurovision nonsense.
Yaaaaas Eurofans. We are SO back.
Source: https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/live/2026/may/16/eurovision-song-contest-2026-live
About the Author
